Karma is A Bitch

“What are you doing here?”

It took me a few seconds to finally talk after staring at Connor like a complete idiot. He looked different. The “I look better without you” kind of different. I straightened my posture to mimic his physique.

“I saw you from across the hall. I thought I'd come over and let you know I was here. I don't want any awkward tension...”

I furrowed my brows and cocked my head. “Awkward tension? You should have thought about that before you hit Jonah!”

Henry and Sarah stood to the side of us. Both frozen, but only their eyes moving from person to person.

Connor laughed. “Oh come on, pretty boy couldn't take a hit? Like that little bitch ass didn't deserve it.”

“Bitch ass?” I crossed my arms. I could see Henry's eyebrows climbing up his forehead as if to say 'oh no he didn't!' I took a moment to breathe, just calming myself enough to lower my volume, and spoke through my teeth. “That little bitch ass is my boyfriend and he's more of a man than you'll ever be. And the only pretty boy here is you. Despite how that sounds, it isn't a compliment. You don't care about anyone but yourself!”

A wave of shock struck Connor's face. “Oh, is that right?” He bent down to pick up the papers that dropped earlier and stood back up after collecting them. “I have to say I'm kind of surprised, but not really.” He leaned in a little closer to me and whispered, “He's a pussy, and yet you two make a great couple.”

I leaned away come Connor. I felt my shoulders tightening. I wanted to verbally rip Connor to shreds, but I couldn't. I was standing in the middle of the hospital lobby during the peak hours of a career fair. If I were to ever have a public meltdown this would be the worst possible place for it to occur. I could kiss my professional career good bye. Instead I stood biting my cheeks.

Connor continued to smile. He was getting some sick pleasure out of knowing how badly he was upsetting me. “So, anyway, like I was saying, I'm here because of...”

“Shut the hell up. No one cares why you're here.” Sarah held up her hand to his face. Henry snarled as he walked past Connor. Sarah grabbed my arm and pulled me along.

We went down the hall and around the corner. The coast was finally clear. I stopped walking and leaned my back against the wall trying to focus on bringing my heart rate down.

“What a knob” Henry muttered in disbelief.

Sarah rubbed my arm. “It's okay, Lynn”

“Thank you” I took one last deep breath. “I'm pretty sure I would have murdered him if you hadn't stepped in.”

“Hey” She slightly shook my shoulder until I looked at her. “Do you know how many times you've saved my ass? I owed you.” She smiled. “I'm just sorry I encouraged you to shag that prick.”

“Yeah” I rolled my eyes. “I'm sorry I encouraged myself too.”

“What's the deal with you two anyway?” Henry asked.

“Henry!” Sarah hushed him. “You can't just ask people why they hate each other.”

“No it's okay.” I pushed myself off the wall and continued walking to class. I hadn't told anyone, other than Kadie, what had really happened between Connor and I. Everyone assumed that we had a falling out and his absence during his trip to Asia was our breaking point. I was ashamed in myself for the final acts that took place in order to cause our break up, but things between us at that time were already rocky. The break up was bound to happen. “Connor told me he loved me, but as hard as I tried I just couldn't say it back.”

“Doesn't seem like reason enough to break things off. No two people start loving each other at the exact same moment.” Henry shrugged.

“Well, he didn't seem to get that memo. He started shutting me out and refusing to work on our relationship. As much as I was trying to surround myself around him I felt so alone. What more could I have done?” I looked at the two, both of them quietly walking along.

One of our professors turned the corner of the hallway directly in front of us. We smiled and nodded, acknowledging his presence as he walked past.

“So one night Jonah and I hung out. We talked for hours. I felt like for the first time someone was actually listening to me. And the way he looked at me. Like, I was actually there. Needless to say one thing led to the next. As upset as I was with the way Connor had been treating me, I knew that what I did was unacceptable. I had to tell him. So, I did, and that ended up with Jonah getting a bloody nose.”

“What a waste of a perfectly handsome man.” Henry sighed.

Sarah slapped the back of her hand across Henry's chest so hard he lunged forward in pain.

I couldn't get much done in class that day. My mind kept wandering about the many different responses I should have snapped at Connor instead of standing there quietly. I'd reenacted at least 40 different versions of how our conversation should have went down instead of the way it actually did.

It was late in the afternoon when we'd walked into our last class of the day. The room was split up into sections listed by alphabets.

“Please find the corresponding letter of your last name and sit in the section marked appropriately” The professor's assistant shouted as each group of students walked in.

Sarah, Henry, and I looked at one another confused. Breaking off into groups wasn't something that we'd ever had to do. It was weird and unfamiliar.

I went over to the table marked “A-C” and sat down while Sarah and Henry sat at the table next to me marked “D-F”.

The room was finally filled when our professor asked for everyone's attention.

“As you all know, there's only a few short months before we begin our rotations. I refuse to have incompetent students representing me in the hospital, so in preparation of clinicals we will be starting a new program in which you will be paired with a mentor that you'll meet with once a week in order to gather data to write a mock case study. You will be graded on your report, but most importantly the heavier weight of the grade will be determined by a report written by your mentor.”

There was a collective grumble that filled the room.

“A thru C, you will be with Dr. Sean Ansari.” The professor's assistant pulled him aside to whisper in his ear. After a brief couple of seconds he went back to announcing the name of the mentors. "I'm sorry, group A thru C it seems Dr. Ansari will be unable to participate. Let's see who's next on the list..." he looked down at the sheet of paper in his hands. “Ah! You will be mentored by Dr. Connor Cassidy."

My heart dropped and I audibly whispered my last words of defeat. “Oh, fuck me.”