Sky Full of Stars

“Any idea if Kylie's coming today?”

I was caught off guard when Jeff asked of her whereabouts. It was Monday morning and there was no sign of Kylie at group. I froze for a second not knowing how to respond. Usually if she was working an overnight shift or was called in early to work she would text me to let me know she wouldn't be coming, but with everything going on I knew that wouldn't be the case today.

“Not sure” I shrugged. “Maybe she's working.”

“You haven't heard anything?” He asked, confused.

“Nope” I shook my head.

“Hmm” he mumbled. “I guess we can assume she isn't coming.” He turned around to face everyone “Alright, grab a mat and meet me by the pond!”

There was only four of us today. It seemed like everyone had the same idea to skip group, including Jonah. He was starting test runs for his show and wasn't going to make it. I was just thankful today was yoga day. I don't think my thighs could have handled anymore lunges up and down the hills of the park.

As much as I tried to take deep breathes and focus on my center, I couldn't stop thinking about Kylie. Her face when she'd seen Jonah and I together, the way she stormed out, and how she might have felt afterward. So, once we were finished with out hour long session, I grabbed a flowy top out of my bag and threw it on over my workout tank and yoga pants and headed over to the hospital to see Kylie.

I walked into the lobby and examined the directory. I was completely lost as to where to go. I should have thought out this plan a little better.

I saw a girl, in my peripheral, exit the elevators and walk past me. She stopped and stared for a second before she responded, “Lynn?”

It was Kylie. She looked like she was just getting off from her shift by the darkness under her eyes. “Kylie” I smiled. “I didn't hear from you this morning, so I got worried.” It was one of those moments when you don't realize what you're saying until after you've said it.

She laughed briefly. “Wait, you were worried about me because I didn't text you to let you know I wasn't coming to group this morning? You've got to be shitting me, right? That's the only thing you're worried about?” she tilted her head to the side and crossed her arms over her chest.

“That wasn't what I meant. Look, can we just sit down and talk for a minute, please?” I spoke in a low whisper as a group of workers entered the hospital through the rotating doors.

She rolled her eyes and sighed before responding. “Fine. There's a cafe in the main building.”

I followed Kylie's lead. It was a short walk through a long hallway before we got there. We sat down at a table for two in the corner of the cafe.

“Jonah told me everything.” She said as her eyes examined a small menu card.

“I...”

She cut me off before I could even say anything. “Why didn't you tell me? I told you I was into him, if you still had feelings for him you should have said something.”

“I didn't think I did.” I quickly responded. “Or at least I did a great job at convincing myself I didn't have feelings for him. And I didn't tell you because if something did continue between you two I didn't want things to get awkward with us. ”

“That worked out pretty well didn't it?” Her eyes looked up from the menu card.

“Look, I'm not going to apologize for the history behind Jonah and I, but I do want to apologize for how everything happened. Things shouldn't have gone as far as they did at the party. We got too carried away and didn't realize who we were hurting along the way. I'm sorry.”

Kylie sighed heavily and sat back in her chair, slouching over. “I guess I can't be mad at you.” she mumbled. “I probably would've done the same thing.” She took a sugar packet out of it's holder and began fiddling with it. “Jonah and I'd been hanging out a lot the last couple of weeks. I feel so stupid I didn't catch on to all the hints. He'd talk about you all the time. It was like something was always reminding him of you. When we were together nothing would ever go far enough between us. I should have put two and two together. But instead I was mesmerized by his lifestyle. The fact that someone like him was into someone as normal as me.”

“Kylie” I said firm enough to get her attention. “You're obviously smart” I pointed to her scrubs. “And beautiful. You'll find the right guy eventually. I promise.”

The corners of her mouth twitched into a slight smile. “Who ever he is, I hope he loves me as much as Jonah loves you.”

I was glad we were able to sit down and talk everything through. It gave us a chance to understand each other better, which made it easier for Kylie to move on. We chatted for a bit longer before I headed back home.

That night I had asked Jonah to come over. We both knew we wanted to be with each other, but with everything that went on with Jonah moving, things between Connor, and now Kylie, we decided that if we were going to be back together, we wanted to “start fresh”.

It was close to 8 when Jonah knocked on my door. I opened it to find him standing with a bouquet of peonies. “These are still your favorite, right?” He asked as he hesitated to give them to me.

“You remembered!” I smiled as I took the flowers from him. I gave him a hug and kissed him on the cheek.

“How could I forget” he smiled back. “So what's the plans for tonight. Are you going to tell me already?”

“Why are you so nervous?” I laughed at the lack of reaction from Jonah.

“It's my second chance at a first date with a girl who's been playing hard to get” His hands softly brushed my cheek and then gently wrapped around my neck. “What's there not to be nervous about?” I grabbed his hand and intertwined our fingers. “Plus, it feels weird to not be in control.”

Jonah and I went to downtown for dinner. Afterward we took a cab to Brooklyn. The driver gave us a strange look when I had given him an address for a run down neighborhood. There weren't any street lights in the area. It looked like the apocalypse had came early. Everything was shattered and left abandoned.

“You're not going to kill me are you?” Jonah asked as our cab drove away.

I laughed. “On our first date, you took me to that amusement park, the one you worked at during the summer when you were a kid. You went there occasionally when you needed to escape from everything. A place that reminded you of your childhood. The simpler times...”

“Yeah...” Jonah stretched out his words confused by where I was getting. He followed me as I walked to an empty apartment complex. There were walk up stairs. I pulled down the ladder and began climbing.

“Well, this is that place for me.” I looked down to see Jonah still standing on the ground.

“So you're telling me you were a gangster once a upon a time ago?” He joked.

I gestured for Jonah to start climbing up after me. “I met Jebrone the first couple of weeks of moving to New York. He told me how his dad would buy out certain properties and reconstruct them before selling them back for a fortune. Anyway, so this was one of his properties. Unfortunately with the economy dropping he had to let this ship sink. So, Jebrone being the savvy person he is didn't want this place to go to waste. He would have parties here from time to time since it's an empty lot and you can pretty much play music as loud as you want to.”

Jonah grunted as he lifted himself over the ledge and onto the rooftop.

“Every time we came to a party here people would stand against the ledge and admire the view of Manhattan.”

“She's a charming little slut, isn't she?” Jonah smiled while he took in the sight as the city glowed in all it's glory. He turned to me, “So, this is your happy place then?”

“Not quiet” I smiled and shook my head. I pulled Jonah's arm and led him to the center of the rooftop, away from the distracting skyline. “Everyone thought they had the best view, but they didn't. I did.” I pointed at the sky. Jonah looked up amazed. There were thousands of stars twinkling above our heads. Stars that would have never been visible from the flashy street signs in the city.

“That's unbelievable.” Jonah whispered as he continued to gaze at the sky.

“It's far enough from the lights in the city where you can actually see the stars. It reminds me of when I was a little girl. After a long day of running around and playing with the neighborhood kids, we'd just crash and lay out in the backyard staring up at the sky. We were kids, but what little worries we did have would be wiped away when we were looking up at the sky and counting the stars. I mean it doesn't compare to Texas, but...”

Jonah looked down, offering me his hand. “Dance with me.”

I laughed thinking he was joking.

“You've never danced under the stars?” He asked.

“No, have you?”

“No, but this seems like the perfect opportunity.” He stood waiting for me to grab his hand.

I walked towards him and wrapped my arms around his shoulder. His hands rested on the small of my back. Our bodies were close enough to feel each others heartbeat. We swayed slowly back and forth. We danced in silence while we stared into each others eyes. Jonah leaned his head down and I kissed him. 

We kissed slow at first and gradually built up to the pace of a couple who'd just seen each other for the first time in forever.

Every second that passed intensified our passion. Our grip grew tighter as if we were refusing to let the other go.

"I've never seen anything so beautiful."