Thursday, November 28, 2013

Quit Playing Games With My Heart

“Should I take anything with me? No, right? Because what's the point I'm trying to bring all my stuff here” Kadie started unpacking all her clothes she had just thrown into her suitcase.

“Isn't your flight in a couple of hours?” I was a little annoyed Kadie woke me up so early. She was going back to Texas for a few days to pack up her things to bring back to the City.

“Ugh, forget it, I'll just take empty suitcases so I can easily bring things back. Should I bring everything or just my winter stuff for now? I'm sure summer actually starts in summer here. God, I'm so glad I'm living in New York now! But wait, what if everything doesn't fit in my suitcases? Should I rent a U-haul? Shipping it will be crazy expensive! Oh my god!

Kadie was talking to herself a mile a minute. I quietly laid on her bed under the covers and watched her slowly self destruct.

“Alright well I'm just going to jump in the shower real quick. I'll call a cab to pick us up in an hour.” I started walking out of Kadie's room when she stopped me.

“Uh, yeah, about that...” She stood up from the floor and fiddled with her fingers. “Adam kind of told me he'd take me. I figured it'd save us the cab fare since he has his own car and all.”

I was pleasantly surprised. “Really? Didn't you guys just go on your first date last night?”

“We did” Kadie started to blush and sway her shoulders back and forth like a little girl. “We really hit it off last night. I'm so glad you pushed me into going out with him!”

“Well gone head, girl!”

I helped Kadie pack a few essentials and soon enough Adam had came by to take over. After going downstairs to wave Kadie off I found myself in an empty apartment yet again. I wanted to keep my mind off the whole Jonah incident so I called Sarah to see if she'd want to get books for classes. We decided to meet on campus

Once I came out of the subway and rounded 97st street I noticed Sarah standing with Henry. I couldn't help but roll my eyes. I wasn't about to deal with his snobby bullshit today. So when I approached them I gave Sarah a hug and ignored Henry. He seemed offended which made me happy. We proceeded to the campus book store and grabbed what we needed. Afterward we went a few streets over to a bakery on the Upper East Side for a mid-afternoon snack. Henry and I sat down at a table while Sarah went up to the counter to order.

“Look, I know we got off on a rough start. I was having a bad day and took it out by humiliating you. I'm sorry.” Henry looked genuinely apologetic. The nice southern belle in me decided to forgive him. 

“It's fine. Let's just forget about it. Besides I knew you had to have a heart to be with a sweet guy like Jebrone” Henry smiled.

Right then Sarah came over with a tray full of pastries.“I see you two finally decided to make nice!” She winked and handed each of us a cup of tea. I had my phone on the table and it started to vibrate.

“Ugh” I knew it was Jonah again. He had texted me this time.

Hey, you ran out on me last night. Wanted to make sure you're okay?

Henry and Sarah looked concerned as I kept violently tapping my phone to turn off.

“I think she's gone mad” Henry said to Sarah. They both looked at each other and took a sip of their tea.

“No, it's just this guy I’ve been seeing. He...well..It's kind of a long story”

“Lucky for you our crazy Aunt Silvi is in town staying at our place and we're avoiding her like the plague. So...” Henry said as he leaned his elbow onto the table intrigued by what I was about to say.

I didn't know where to start. I ended up telling them the long form of the story from beginning to last night. “..So just as I start pulling off his jeans he jumps up and goes into his room. When he comes back out he's acting like nothing even happened. What the hell?”

“Oh, he's a virgin. For sure he's a virgin! I'll be damned if he's not!” Henry said

Sarah giggled and added, “I'm sure he's not, Lynn”

“I don't know guys. He can't be. He's 29 and too good looking to not be.” But then I remembered the comic books and figurines he had at his apartment and started to think Henry might be right.

“Then he's totally got a problem...if you know what I mean.” Henry said matter-of-factually

“No trust me, He had to have some major willpower to stop himself” Henry's eyes widened at the thought while Sarah grimaced.

“Lynn, you'll never know unless you talk to him about it. He seems like a good guy. You don't want to waste it because of these mad assumptions Henry is making.”

“What? It's not my fault he's a virgin!” He said quickly before taking another sip of his tea. Sarah and I both dropped what we were doing and glared at Henry.

I decided to take Sarah's advice and text Jonah back. I let him know I was okay and lied about running out because Kadie was locked out of the apartment.

He texted back, “Glad you're okay! Work day flow's kinda slow today swing by and I can show you what goes on backstage?”

He didn't have to ask me twice. I was a fan of the show and was so excited that I might get a chance to meet the host. After Sarah, Henry, and I parted I hailed a cab and went down to the plaza where Jonah worked. He met me outside. As I was walking up to Jonah a group of 3 girls got to him first.

“Are you Jonah from the late night show?” one of the girls squealed

He caught my eye and laughed embarrassingly. “Yeah, that's me”

The girls excitedly jumped. “We love you on the show! You're so funny!” They were all over him touching his hands and arms.

“And even hotter in person!” a petite girl in the back of the group shouted. They all giggled. “Can we please take a picture with you?!”

I volunteered to take the picture. They said their goodbyes and Jonah and I were left standing alone. I couldn't help but think that with girls constantly after him that he'd have any problems. We gave each other a side hug and walked into the building.

After getting me past security we were on the 7th floor where the show recorded. We walked through a hallway with hundreds of hanging wires and set pieces leaning against the wall. There were people with huge headsets and clip boards running around. Jonah took me back to the writer's room.

“So this is pretty much where we all meet after we have some of our own material and then we try to bounce ideas off of each other to make it cohesive with the show's voice.” He pointed to a row of cubicles in the back of the room. “Those are where the newer writers sit. We pretty much harass them while we're out here. Kinda like a big brother little brother thing” Jonah took a Nerf ball and threw it towards the cubicle where it bounced off a young guy's head. He then lead me to a private office off the side of the writer's room.

“And this is my office.” He spread out his arms. His office was actually kind of cool. He had classic movie posters, signed by the cast, up and framed. There was a wall of framed pictures of him with random celebrities. His Harvard degree hung proudly above everything. I walked around his desk to admire the beautiful view he had of the city.

“That's my favorite building!” I pointed to the Chrysler.

“Mine too” He smiled back.

From Jonah's office we went to the green room where he introduced me to the actress that was coming on the show to promote her new movie. Kadie would always sneak me into her work events so I've met my share of celebrities. Thankfully I knew how to keep cool. Just then the host of the show walked into the room. Jonah introduced us. I have to admit my knees went weak.

“I'm such a huge fan! I've grown up watching you through your career!”

“That's so sweet, thank you!” He shook my hand and signaled to Jonah, “Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?” They both walked off a few feet away. I tried really hard to listen while trying just as hard to look like I wasn't listening. I couldn't quiet make out everything they were saying but I did hear the host say, “A new girl everyday? Jonah when are you going to stop fucking around?” Uh, what? Here I was thinking Jonah had intimacy issues but really he's known for getting around? Is Jonah a player?

They continued talking for another minute before they walked back over. The host put his arm around my shoulder and said, “You're the first one Joni's brought back here. You, my friend, are a lucky lady!” He turned back towards Jonah, “Keep in mind what we talked about.” he had a serious look on his face but then smiled when he pointed towards me, “And don't mess this up, son. She's gorgeous” he winked and made his way over to the actress sitting on the other side of the room.

Jonah awkwardly laughed, “We'll be waiting outside for the monologue read through” He quickly grabbed my arm and stormed out of the room. We went to a private sitting area just behind the cameras. “Sit here, I'll be right back” He went over to a man in a business suit standing off by the stage.

As I was looking around the studio and taking it all in I caught the eye of a blond girl wearing a blazer and pencil skirt that made her look prim and proper. She had a pin of the network's logo on her pocket. Which meant she was probably an intern. She came towards me. “I'm sorry miss, this area is for the producers only. Audience members are only allowed to sit behind the railings”

“I was told to sit here by-” I pointed towards Jonah and she cut me off before I could finish

“Oh” She looked over at Jonah and made a face. “Then you're fine. My apologies”

There was something going on. From the host's comment to the intern's face when seeing Jonah. I needed to know what it was. So I stood up and pulled her off to the side. “Hey, look, I saw the face you made. Is there something I need to know about Jonah?” I shocked myself at how straight forward I was being. I guess Kadie was right, the City really was changing me.

“Did I make a face? I didn't mean to if I did.” She seemed startled, but kept calm.

I let out a heavy sigh. “Never mind. I think I'm just paranoid. I'm sorry” I started to walk back to my chair when she stopped me.

“Wait!” I turned around again. Her expression had completely changed. She looked nervous. “Just bewteen us, woman to woman, there's been a lot of rumors that Jonah-” Right then she stopped and looked over my shoulder. Her eyes widened. When I turned around to see who she was looking at I saw Jonah coming. I turned back towards her and she was out of sight.

“What was the intern talking to you about?” Jonah asked

“Oh, nothing, she told me I couldn't sit there but I told her I was with you”

“Yeah, she can be really annoying. Just ignore her.”

I suddenly lost all interest in being backstage at the show. I needed an excuse to leave. I quickly shot Sarah a 911 text and pretended I was getting a phone call.

“Oh shit! It's my school I have to take this!” Jonah looked confused as I scurried out of the studio. I went into the hallway and pretended to hang up the phone when I saw Jonah coming up behind me a minute later. “I wish I could stay, this was so much fun, but I have this thing at school, they just called know...I have to go!” I didn't have enough time to think of a legitimate excuse.

“Oh, uh, okay well-”

I cut Jonah off, “I'm sorry! I'll see you maybe later. Who knows” I always ramble when I'm lying.

Jonah stood still and bemused as I walked away. I let Sarah know to meet me up again and she texted back,“Ugh thank god, I was thinking I'd have to go home to my aunt. Henry and I will be over in a few”

It was late evening so we met up for dinner this time. They both quickly ran to the table eager to find out what I had to say.

Henry slammed his hand on the table and shouted, “I told you he had a small willy!”

“What? Henry, no. You never even said that!”

“Well what is it? What's his problem?!” Sarah was practically scratching the table in anticipation.

“He's a man whore! Or atleast I think he is...” I went on to tell Sarah and Henry what happened while I was at the show.

Henry rolled his eyes, “That's it? I thought it'd be something more dramatic” He signaled for the waiter to come over. Henry was completely unentertained now.

Sarah on the other hand started piecing the puzzle together, “Wait no, it makes sense! You two go out on dates but aren't bound sexually, while other girls bang him but aren't bound to him by going on dates. That way he gets to have a girlfriend without actually having one. Classic player move!” she quickly took back her comment when she saw how upset I was, "I'm sorry! I'm just brainstorming but I'm sure that's not it!"

“No, I think you're onto something. Before I could even say hi to him these girls were all over him. I'm sure he gets it all the time where ever he goes. Ugh, how could I be so stupid for thinking he liked me” I covered my face with my hands completely embarrassed. I was slowly starting to convince myself Sarah's theory was true. "He's just using me for what he doesn't get from those other girls. For the chase."


  1. Enjoyed the post as usual, but so amnoyed by Lynn. Why couldn't sje jist asl Jonah upfront? Happy Thanksgiving!

  2. sorry *she *just ask

  3. Disappointed in Lynn. "Quit Playing Games"? Yeah, but that's what she is doing. WTH? Ball up and ask him what's going on. Quit running and speculating. Ugh. mum