Wednesday, January 1, 2014

The Hangover

“Oh my God!” I shouted when I saw Jaime “What the hell is going on?! And where the hell is my shirt??” I shoved him so hard he fell backwards.

Jaime started laughing and I could literally feel my blood boiling “Do you really not remember?”

“Look Jaime, I don't know what kind of sick twisted shit you're into but-”

“Woah! Woah! Woah! This was not my doing!” Jaime threw up both his hands accusingly “You're so not my type!”

I dropped my head into my hands. I didn't know how much more of Jaime and his rude behavior I could take. I inhaled a deep breath to calm myself down.

“So, then what the hell happened??”

“Do you want the long or short form of the story?”


“Okay, fine, long it is” He started unbuttoning his dress shirt and took it off. He was wearing a white tank underneath and handed the shirt to me “First, take this, you're going to need it more then I do” He smirked.

I snatched the shirt from Jaime's hands and shot him a deadly look.

“Last night, when we were at the hotel's bar you had forgotten your purse there. I was going to give it back to you but I saw you were too busy talking to some douche bag doctor.”

I was slowly buttoning up the shirt Jaime had given me as I intently listened to his story.

“I guess you remembered you left it there so you came back looking for it and I told you I wouldn't give it to you until you did three straight shots in a row.”

“That doesn't make sense. It takes a lot of alcohol for me to black out.” I wasn't much of a drinker, but there was this one time back in college when Kadie and a few of our friends went to New Orleans for a weekend and let's just say, things got a little crazy. That was the only other time I had ever woken up confused about the night before.

“I didn't say those were the only drinks you had” Jaime rolled his eyes “Plus, you already looked like you had one too many drinks. You wanted to prove a point so you made the bartender give you three more shots, as if I actually gave two shits. I gave you your purse and you left.”

“That still doesn't explain why I don't have my shirt and why we're sitting in a limo with no driver.”

“I'm not done! You're so impatient! Do you want to know the whole story or not?” We both gave each other an intense stare before he continued “A while after you left I decided to leave too. I went outside and you were still out there at the end of the street, crying.”

“Oh please, you really think I'm going to believe you came to my rescue?!”

“Hey, just cause I don't like you doesn't mean I'm heartless! I saw you crying so I figured I'd get you a cab and send you on your way. When one finally came around you kept telling the driver to take you to some guy's place. Jonas? Joseph? Jonah? I don't know it was hard to tell what you were saying”

My eyes widened.

“Anyway the driver refused to take you. I tried to call someone from your phone but you wouldn't tell me your passcode. You were afraid I would call your parents and I responded with calling you a few names which didn't sit too well with you”

The part about me flipping out if my parents found out was completely believable. But hey, my dad's already caught me half naked with a guy so there's not a lot of respect to lose there.

“You strutted your way over to a bar down the street”

“Ew, the biker bar?”

Jaime laughed at me before he continued “Yeah, man, if you could have only seen it. You got up on those tables and started dancing for those old guys like it was your job! The best part was you kept yelling 'You still think I'm a good girl?' And let me tell you, those bikers really enjoyed it!”

“Oh my God!” I felt my face burning red

“A few of them threw some cash at you and fast forward to later that night when you went to the convenient store down the street and bought a shit ton of candy with your whore money. You ended up throwing it up and your shirt got dirty so you went to the laundry mat to wash it. There weren't any cabs around so a friend of mine sent his driver to pick us up. But you still wouldn't tell me your address so we're here.”

“Where's the driver?”

“He got tired of waiting so he went to grab breakfast”

I grabbed my purse and my shoes and started climbing towards the end of the limo “Okay, well, I appreciate you not taking advantage of me, oh wait you did by making me make a fool of myself”

“Trust me honey, I saved your life. You owe me” Jaime pulled out a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one up.

“You're so disgusting I can't even stand you! I don't owe you anything!” I pushed the car door open and made my way down the street until I was able to hail a cab.

When I got back to the apartment Kadie was waiting for me. She figured I stayed with my parents when I hadn't came back but I filled her in on the real reason why.

“You're kidding! You lived a real life Hangover. But that Jaime sounds like such a douche lord!” Kadie found my night more amusing than I did.

I was so frustrated from everything that had been happening lately. And I was completely exhausted from my night. I ended up sleeping it off for the rest of the day.

When I had woken up that evening I heard some voices from the living room. It was Kadie and Adam. They were watching a movie so I decided to join them.

I guess Kadie hadn't brought Adam up to date with my situation with Jonah because he decided to ask me about it.

“Lynn, where has Jonah been? Haven't see him around much lately”

“Babe, no-” Kadie tried changing the subject but I stopped her.

“Oh, me and Jonah aren't really seeing each other any more. The Late Night show is moving to LA so he's going with them” I let out a big exhale which made Kadie and Adam exchange an awkward look.

“Don't worry about it. New York's a big city with a ton of great guys like me!” Adam joked.

I gave him a half smile and pretended to pay attention to the movie.

The silence was broken by the obnoxious vibrations of my phone. It was in my room on my night stand so I went in to get it. I sat down on my bed as I read the text from Connor

“Still trying to figure out some good places to eat, any suggestions”

I texted him back letting him know of a few restaurants in his area.

“Great! How bout dinner at the Thai place tomorrow?” Connor texted back.

I was hesitant to reply. I knew I should be giving myself a break from jumping from guy to guy, but Connor seemed sweet and I knew he was new to the City. I remembered how, had I not met Jonah, I would have been lost around the city too. So, I agreed to go to dinner.... as friends.

**Happy New Years everyone! Hope everyone had a fun and safe night! What do you think some of Lynn's resolutions should be? And what are some of yours?**


  1. Happy new year! Thanks for posting during the holidays! I am enjoying Lynn's story so much!

    1. Thank you! Hope your new year is going good! I'm glad you're enjoying the blog so far :)

  2. Yes, thanks for posting during the holidays! I love reading the blog!

  3. To not drink.. EVER lol

    Great post! Love your blog ;-)

  4. I would be beside myself if all of that had happened to me and I had no recollection of it. Drinking just to prove a point shows that Lynn has some growing up to do. And why she is trying to impress Jamie is beyond me. mum

  5. Anyone read other fictional blogs similar to this one. I also read Love Sex Pizza.

  6. Just found this blog and read all of it! Love it!! Heads up "y'all" is a contraction of the words you and all so the apostrophe goes between the y and the a, not between the a and l as you have been using it (ya'll). Keep up the great work!

  7. Oh man I just found out about your blog and love love love it. I'm sad I ran out of posts to read will definitely be back to keep up!


  9. I absolutely LOVE your blog! I found it yesterday and read all your posts in one day :) thank you for sharing your gift of writing with us, please keep up the good work! really looking forward to new posts, please make it work between Lynn and Jonah ;n;

  10. Oh wow, this is one amazing blog. Keep it up, I will be coming back for more.

  11. So there were too many new reader comments for me to respond to lol but I'd like to thank all of my new readers (and current readers) for their love and support! Your feedback is what fuels my motivation!

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